Titles are Overrated
by Ladyofthewoodhomiefoo
Summary: Ok so this is basically a comdey about pirates of the caribbean, so basically they all live in the future but they're used to it because they are all immortal somehow, i didn't specify how because i really don't know how..R&R enjoy!
1. Why don't we all live together!

Will turner looked out the window of his apartment. He was still waiting for Jack to come out of the shower, which was getting really old because he'd been in there for over an hour. Will sighed and walked over to the bathroom door.

"Jack c'mon! Get out of the bath room!" exclaimed Will as he banged his head on the door. Jack ignored Will's pleading attempts to get into the bathroom and kept on singing.

Will looked at his watch. He had to go to work in ten minutes, if he didn't get in the bathroom fast he would be late. He once more tried to get Jack out by constantly banging on the door, but when he realized that that would never work he walked down the stairs and out the door. He went across the hall and knocked on the door. A beautiful woman opened the door and smiled at him.

"Hello Will, can I help you?" she asked.

Will smiled back. "Actually Elizabeth, yeah, Jack won't get out of the shower and well I really need to get ready for work."

"Oh, well of course you can use my bathroom," Elizabeth said. She stepped aside to reveal a neat and tidy apartment. Will brushed past her and walked into the bathroom. He quickly got ready for work and sped out of the door. Elizabeth opened the front door for him and kissed him lightly on the cheek as he was leaving.

"Who was that?" came a voice from a back room in Elizabeth's apartment. Elizabeth turned around to see Anamaria standing in the door way of her room. She was dressed in a huge, puffy robe and large bunny slippers.

"That was just Will making his morning bathroom stop here. You know, Jack wouldn't get out of the bathroom," replied Elizabeth. Anamaria shook her head and shuffled back into her room.

Elizabeth slipped on her jogging shoes and headed down the stairs of the apartment complex. The morning was crisp and cool and slightly clear for L.A. The smog had lifted a little to reveal a bright blue sky. Elizabeth jogged down the side walk toward the larger part of the city. She ran past the large "haunted" house and toward the beach where the tide was coming in.

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After two whole hours Jack managed to come out of the bathroom. He looked luminously clean. His hair was cut short and his mustache and beard shaved off. He finally looked like a business man. He walked into the kitchen and grabbed some bread out of the cupboard. A knock suddenly sounded at his door. Jack looked through the peephole to see Norrington peering through the very same peephole.

"Go away you bloody Norrington!" Jack shouted at the door.

"Jack Sparrow let me in now, or I'll send the whole British Royal navy after you!" called Norrington from outside the door. Jack shook his head and cracked the door open.

"What do _you_ want?" asked Jack with a quizzical brow.

"I need some sugar," replied Norrington. In his hands he held an empty sugar container. Jack rolled his eyes and took the sugar container. He slammed the door in Norrington's face and retreated to his kitchen.

"I could just keep this," Jack said to himself as he filled Norrington's pathetic sugar container. He opened the door and thrust the sugar at Norrington.

"Remember, next time you feel like last naming me, it's CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow," Jack said as he once again shut the door. Norrington stood there for a while staring dumbly at Jack's door, still holding his pathetic sugar. Finally Norrington walked back to his apartment.

"This is insane, why don't we all just bloody live together!" Jack shouted at no one in particular. He had been tired of living with just Will for the past thousand years. He walked back into his kitchen to find his toast on fire in the toaster. At this point Jack really didn't care and just grabbed the toast and threw water on the toaster. He crammed the burnt toast into his mouth and barged out the door. He had work to do anyway. On his way out of the building Jack ran into Elizabeth who had just come back from her morning jog. She nearly crashed into him as she ran up the steps.

"Hey Jack," said Elizabeth.

"Hmph," said Jack as he walked to his car.

"Off to work?" Elizabeth asked as Jack climbed into the driver's seat. He only scowled at her and drove away. Elizabeth shrugged and walked back into the building. She still didn't understand why they all didn't live together. It would make their lives so much easier. She stomped back up the stairs to her apartment. She opened the door to find Anamaria sitting on the couch watching T.V. and eating a bowl of Frosted Flakes.

"Do you ever wonder why we don't all just live together?" Elizabeth asked as she untied her shoe laces. Anamaria looked at her and rolled her eyes.

"Of course I do. It's just those losers across the hall from us refuse to live with Norrington," Ana said. She shoved a spoon full of frosted flakes in her mouth.

"Well he is kind of a moron. I can see where Jack, Will, and Gibbs refuse to live with him," replied Elizabeth.

"Well I'd live with him, but I wouldn't enjoy it," replied Ana. Elizabeth looked at her and thought for a moment. Suddenly an idea formed in her head.

"What if we moved into that house down the street? You know that one that's supposed to be "haunted"," Elizabeth asked. Ana gave her a blank stare. Everyone knew that house wasn't really haunted, but still there was still that chance that it was haunted.

"I dunno, maybe that's not such a good idea," Ana protested.

"Oh c'mon we know it isn't haunted and we can finally all live together again!" Elizabeth exclaimed. Ana gave her a sheepish look. She knew this idea would fall through as soon as Jack heard he would have to live with that moron Norrington. Elizabeth ran out the door and across the hall to Gibbs's apartment.

Gibbs heard a sharp knock at the door. He turned his attention slightly from the T.V. The knock persisted. Gibbs grunted and walked over to the door. He opened it to find Elizabeth smiling sweetly up at him.

"Gibbs I just had the most brilliant idea!" she exclaimed happily. Gibbs eyed her suspiciously. Elizabeth's ideas weren't always the best.

"Well tell me instead of just standing there all happy," Gibbs said.

"Ok, so what if we all moved into that house down the street. You know, the haunted one!" she exclaimed happily. Gibbs raised an eye brow.

"Uh, well I dunno if that's such a good idea Miss Elizabeth," he replied, his voice a little shaky.

"Why not? Everyone knows it's not _really _haunted," Elizabeth said. Gibbs knew that it wasn't haunted, but part of him was afraid of the fact that it really could be haunted.

"Well, uh I know it's not haunted but still…I uh…I just don't want to live with bloody Norrington," Gibbs said triumphantly. Elizabeth cocked her head at him. She knew there was more to it than Norrington. Gibbs saw the wheels turning in Elizabeth's head.

"Oh look at the time; you know you should get going!" Gibbs explained as he shoved Elizabeth out of the door. Elizabeth protested, but by the time she had turned back around Gibbs had shut the door and gone back to his business. Elizabeth walked over to Norrington's apartment and knocked on the door.

Norrington opened the door to find Elizabeth beaming at him. He gave her a sly look and closed the door a little bit.

"What is it Elizabeth?" he asked with a sigh. Elizabeth opened his door and walked into his apartment. She plopped down on the couch and started eating the bag of chips that Norrington had recently been snacking on.

"Well I have a proposition for you," she said nonchalantly. Norrington knew there was something wrong.

"I'm afraid to ask, but what is this proposition?" He asked.

"Well, I was thinking that we should all move into that house down the street, you know that one that's "haunted"," Elizabeth said.

Norrington's face turned bright white. "No! We can't!"

"And why not?" Elizabeth asked, a grin forming on her face.

Norrington glared at her. He knew the house wasn't haunted, but still there was always that chance that it really was haunted. He quickly tried to think of reasons to get out of living in that house.

"Well um, you see I'm allergic to ghosts. Yeah so it would be impossible for me to live there. That wouldn't work at all, I'm terribly sorry Elizabeth," Norrington stumbled. Elizabeth knew he was lying, and it was a pathetic lie at that.

"C'mon James, do it for me," she persuaded.

James gave her a worried look. He finally succumbed to her pleading face. "Oh fine!"

"Yay! Thank you so much James! I knew you weren't really allergic to ghosts!" she exclaimed happily. She hugged Norrington and ran out the door. James looked after her and sighed. What had he gotten himself into?

Will walked up the steps to find Elizabeth running into her apartment. He changed his direction to her apartment and knocked on the door. Anamaria came to the door.

"Hey Will, what's up?" she asked.

"Is Elizabeth here?" Will looked around the apartment. He saw Elizabeth jotting something down on a piece of paper.

"I'm coming Will!" Elizabeth called. She thrust the paper down on the counter and ran over to Will. "Hey, how was your day?"

"It was ok, you know, being an actor is hard," he replied. Elizabeth gave him a dirty look. His looks had gotten him a good acting job, but he was letting his brains go to waste. He was actually very smart, he'd passed college with flying colors, but she was afraid he was wasting his life.

"Yeah, sooo hard," she gave him a little punch on the shoulder. "Listen I have a proposition for you."

Will gave her a slightly worried look. "Tell me quick before I run."

She rolled her eyes. "Very funny, but anyway, what if we all moved into that house down the street? You know the one that's "haunted"?

Will gaped at her, he knew that the house wasn't really haunted, but still there was that chance that it was haunted. "You know, I don't really want to live there. What if Norrington has to room with me! That's a fate worse than death! And you know I don't like ghosts, not after that whole episode with Barbossa!"

"Oh Will, please? You know it's not haunted. Please William?" Elizabeth lightly kissed his cheek.

Will thought for a minute. Elizabeth only called him William when she really wanted something. He had no choice but to agree with her. He nodded his head reluctantly.

Elizabeth's face brightened. "Yay! I love you so much Will!" She kissed him and ran off. Will stared after her before opening the door to his apartment. Jack was no where to be seen. He figured that Jack had gone on yet another mission to con innocent people out of their money. He had never given up the whole pirate thing.

Elizabeth and Anamaria sat at their kitchen table starting out the window. Suddenly a bolt of lightening cracked outside. They had been packing all morning, and so far they had packed five boxes.

"We're never gonna finish packing," Ana looked at the boxes with a disgusted look on her face. Elizabeth looked up at her from her cup of coffee, a frown on her face.

"We could just hire the guys to pack for us," Elizabeth said.

"They wouldn't do that, they're all lazy bums," Ana rolled her eyes. The guys were about as lazy as well, pirates.

"Not if there's something in it for them," Elizabeth smiled. Ana gave her a small grin and walked back to her room.

"I think I'll get dressed, and then I'll go ask the guys for some help," she called as she shut her door behind her. Elizabeth grinned after her. Guys were so easily manipulated.

"No."

"Why not Jack? I promise I'll find your stupid jar of dirt if you do it!" Ana whined.

"No, it's out of the question…wait my what?" Jack's eyes brightened.

"Yeah that's right, that stupid jar of dirt, the one that you shattered. Well I took the liberty of fixing it and putting the stupid dirt back," Ana coaxed. She realized that it would take a lot to get Jack to pack her things.

"Ok so lemme get this straight, you're gonna give me back my jar of dirt if I pack all your crap?" he asked.

"Yes, am I not being clear or something?" an annoyed looked crossed Ana's face. She tapped her foot impatiently waiting for Jack's reply.

"So you'll give me that very same jar of dirt, complete with the very same dirt?" Jack's brow furrowed.

"Yes! Do we have a deal?" Ana barked impatiently.

"Yeah, sure, whatever," Jack replied. He extended his hand to her to shake on the agreement, but she just turned around and walked out the door muttering something about pirates.


	2. What a piece of crap

Jack heaved the last of his boxes into the moving van. He wasn't entirely sure why they were using a moving van if they were only moving a few blocks down the street, but he didn't question Elizabeth's authority.

"All done," he said as he shut the door of the moving van. Elizabeth walked over to the van and got into the passenger's seat.

"Excuse me, but is there a reason that you aren't driving dear Elizabeth?" Jack asked sweetly.

Elizabeth gave him an equal sweet but poisonous look back. "Of course Jack, I hate driving, so let's just go."

Jack sighed and jumped into the driver's seat, "But who will drive my car?"

"Will can do that," Elizabeth smirked. Jack gave her an evil look and turned on the ignition. He absolutely hated letting other people drive his car, especially people like the whelp. He was a good driver but he was a whelp, according to Barbossa, that is.

Jack raced down the street in the moving van. He was probably one of the most reckless drivers around. Not only did he speed but he ignored all the laws of traffic safety. He pulled the van up to the front of the house and pulled to a jerky stop. Elizabeth toppled out of the car and onto the sidewalk.

"You know Jack, maybe next time I'll just drive," she gasped.

"That's a good idea love," Jack grinned. Elizabeth rolled her eyes and walked up to the front porch

"It's a bit well, crappy, dontcha think?" came Jack's voice from behind her. Elizabeth spun around in surprise.

"Jack, you have got to stop doing that. There were too many times on the Pearl when you did that and it scared the shit out of me and I fell into the water," Elizabeth scowled. Jack just smiled innocently at her as he remembered all the hilariously funny times that Elizabeth had in fact fallen over board because he had snuck up on her.

"Well, how are we supposed to live in a piece of crap?" Jack inquired. Elizabeth looked at the house. Maybe she had gotten herself in over her head this time.

"Well uh…well we can fix it up ourselves! It's like an exciting project," Elizabeth exclaimed.

Jack gave her a pointed look. "Exciting?"

"Shut up Jack and just help me clear out the porch," Elizabeth said. She started to move the bits and pieces of the old furniture off the porch. Jack watched her in amusement. He seriously didn't think that she actually thought he would help clear out the house, or the porch for that matter.

"BOO!"

"AHHHHH!" Jack screamed. He fell over onto the ground cursing as he went down.

"Haha I got you Jack!" Will exclaimed gleefully. He and Ana had parked Jack's car in the driveway and were observing the house. Jack glared at Will as he shoved himself off the ground.

"Thanks moron, you successfully managed to scared the hell out of me," Jack dusted himself off and then punched Will in the arm.

"Aww c'mon Jack it was only a joke," Will looked at him innocently.

Jack's face suddenly brightened up. "You're right William, it was just a joke, I forgive you. Just don't come running to me when the ghosts come and get you tonight." Jack brushed past Will and out to the driveway.

"Ello Norry!" he exclaimed cheerfully. Norrington turned to look at Jack who was coming at him with his arms open wide.

"Get away from me Sparrow," Norrington stuck out his arms in protest as Jack pulled him into a hug.

"Ahh I'm melting!" Norrington yelled as he flailed his arms wildly in the air. He finally managed to push Jack away.

"Aww Norry doesn't want to be my friend?" Jack smirked. Norrington gave him a dirty look and started unloading boxes from his car. Jack walked away and back up to the porch where Elizabeth was still clearing debris from what was left of old furniture.

"I think we've all proved that this house is in need of a team effort, so let's all watch Elizabeth work on it," Jack said. Elizabeth turned around to find the rest of the crew watching her intently as she worked.

"Oh and just what do you think you all are doing?" Her lips curled into an evil smile. The rest of the crew gave each other worried looks before Elizabeth had them all working. A smug look appeared on her face as she watched Jack and Will attempt to pull up the weeds around the large oak tree in the front yard.

"Where the hell are Gibbs, Cotton and that short dude when you need them?" Jack asked as he ripped all the leaves off of a large weed.

Will sighed and ripped out the weed Jack was working on. "Eh, they're just not into hard labor."

"Well neither am I!" Jack exclaimed. Will shrugged and got back to weeding.

Jack turned around as he heard the slamming of doors on the driveway. Gibbs, Cotton, and that short dude walked up to the porch and grinned at the rest of the crew.

"And just where have you been mate?" Jack asked Gibbs. Gibbs smiled at him and turned around to talk to Elizabeth.

"Bloody pirates," Jack mumbled to himself. He got up and walked over to Gibbs and Elizabeth.

"How come they don't have to do labor?" Jack whined. Elizabeth rolled her eyes and turned back to Gibbs.

"So you're saying Davy Jones and Barbossa are still out to get us?" she asked.

"Aye, well you see Barbossa isn't all what he used to be. He well um, let's just say he's not the feared pirate he used to be." Gibbs smiled and pointed to the car. "We managed to map out his location, and well we've been scheming."

"So what you're saying is that Barbossa is in a nearby retirement home?" Elizabeth asked.

"Well yes and no. Yes, he is in a retirement home, but no as in not for long," Gibbs said.

Elizabeth cocked her head in wonderment. "What are you boys up to?"

"Oh nothing, but Jack if you wouldn't mind coming with me to pay Barbossa a visit," Gibbs turned to Jack and smirked.

Jack's face lit up. "Of course, I'd never miss a visit to my dear friend Barbossa!" Jack hurried over to his car and got in the driver's seat.

Gibbs gave Jack one look before getting into his own car. "Sorry Jack, but you're a reckless driver."

"Well that's the only way to drive in Long Beach, it is forever trafficy," Jack turned on his ignition. Gibbs sighed and reluctantly gave into Jack's desires. He got out of his own car and got into the passenger's seat of Jack's.

"We'll be back later Elizabeth, don't wait up," Jack said. "Oh and tell dear William that I'm ditching him for Barbossa, I'm sure he'll understand." Jack pulled out of the driveway and sped down the street.

Elizabeth started after him in amusement. "I wonder what they're going to do to poor old Barbossa."

A/N: Sorry for the shortness of this chapter but I have to leave you hanging 


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